Agoraphobia--The beginning

Good evening readers,
in this post I am going to explain the beginning of my trek through hell called IBS and Agoraphobia.


I have had stomach problems all my life, but about 5 months after I turned 16 things got really bad. The first thing my family and friends noticed was I got very skinny, so I weighed my self and found out that I had lost 30lbs in just a month or 2 I had gone from 114lbs down to 84lbs and no one could figure out why,I mean a lot of people thought I was either doing drugs or had an eating disorder but neither of these things were true. 


Then one night my Ex-Fiancée,my mom,my best friend and I were at Albertsons doing some shopping and all of a sudden I had to go to the bathroom BAD so I headed for the restroom but someone was in there and then my first real panic attack happened. I was cramping,sweating, nauseous,my heart was racing and I thought if I did not get home I was going to have a accident or even die,so my Ex got me in the car and all the way home I was crying and panicking and yelling at him to hurry but as soon as we got about a block away from my house I started feeling fine and didn't even need to go to the bathroom any more. Pretty much ever since that night every time I try to leave the house I am hit with a panic attack. But leaving the house is not the only time I get the panic attacks I also get them when I am nervous,stressed or eat trigger foods (I'll explain that later)


I went to many doctors,had all kinds of test's and even had exploratory surgery and no one could tell me what was wrong with me. So I just had to deal with it and so I tried home remedies for stomach pain,weight gainers to try to gain weight and though I did not go far away from the house I would take bike rides to see if I could break through the panic attacks my self (as well as to not go crazy being trapped in my house) but nothing seemed to help,so for years I suffered not only with the pain and panic but also with what the weight loss was doing to me I looked like a skeleton,I had to sleep with pillows between my knees to prevent bruises,my hair was falling out and looked like crap and my immune system was shot so when I got sick it held on to me longer then anyone else (I still have that problem) and it took me over 2 years just to gain 10lbs


When I was 19 things got a little better,I was not in pain EVERYDAY but I was still pretty much homebound though I still took my bike rides. my sister was staying a few blocks away so I would go visit her from time to time and that is where I met Joe (my hubby) thankfully he seemed to except me and all the crazy things that were going on with me and so the next year we got married (and have been together for 13 years now) we had to get married in my front yard since I could not go anywhere but it was a great wedding :)


its wasn't for almost 9 years that a doctor finally found out what was wrong with me and it turned out that it was IBS and he gave me a bunch of reading material about IBS and I took that home and read up on it and searched the internet for more info and found out the reason for all the pain and weight loss was because I was eating all my trigger foods of course I had no idea what a trigger food even was before. Basically a trigger food (which is different for everyone) is something you eat that triggers an IBS attack which for me consists of very painful cramps they way (I have always described it was like broken glass going through my intestines) also I get really nauseous because of the pain and of course the pain also triggers the panic attacks...(oh and by the way the agoraphobia was a result of the IBS) 


well that is all I can write right now (I hope it made some sense I have never been good at writing lol)I am exhausted I did not get much sleep because of an IBS attack last night and today :(


but before I close I wanted to say happily I am now 130lbs thanks to knowing what most of my trigger foods are :)
also if you suffer from IBS ask your doctor about Levsin it is a miracle drug and as soon as I can get the money together to see my doctor I am getting back on it lol....I will write more about Levsin in another post but for now I must say goodnight 


God Bless 
Gayle


oh and here is a picture of me when i was 84lbs (sad isn't it)